There was a time in my life when I longed for the kind of good friends I have now. I mean true kindred spirits. Soulmates. People who care for me and allow me to care for them. People who are at once vulnerable and wise. People who make me feel safe and who welcome my love. I’m blessed indeed.
There’s a trade-off, though, to having people in your life whom you adore. It means when they’re hurting, you’re hurting too. When they’re worried, you’re worried along with them but also for them. When they’re sick, you wish there was something you could do to make them better. At this stage in my life, many of my friends are dealing with big problems: aging parents, troublesome teens, health scares, etc. They aren’t really the types of problems you can laugh at, although sometimes we try.
How do we do it, then? How do we maintain our own sense of calm and peace and energy when those around us are struggling? How do we avoid feeling guilty or ashamed if we cannot always be there for them when they need us? How do we give ourselves permission to feel joy when all around us there is pain? How do we show concern for them while also holding space for ourselves?
For those of us who are creatives, it’s hard to protect our creative time when we know others could use our help. And it’s hard for us to protect our energy even though we know we need it in order to do…
