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Why Is “Allowing” So Dang Hard but So Dang Important?
I’ve never been one to declare New Year’s resolutions or make lists of quarterly objectives. As an artist, I like to keep things fluid so I can embrace opportunities as they arise. Plus, my definitions of “success” have little to do with quantitative results.
I’ve tried doing vision boards but could never understand why I needed a visual to spur me on when the pictures in my head are plenty vivid. I make lists only when I have to. So, you can imagine I felt a bit of trepidation when one of the women’s groups I belong to decided to have every member choose a “word of the year.” My friend sent me a worksheet to help me land on my word, and I grudgingly filled it out. Now, I’m glad I did.
I thought the word I wanted was “service,” a nice action-oriented word for my activator self. But the word that resonated was “allow.” I tried to hold to the word “service,” feeling more comfortable in a space where I could be the driver, but the word “allow” proved pretty assertive, which is funny. I mean, it practically insisted I choose it.
I started making a list of things I needed to allow in my life and came up with this:
–Allow my intuition to guide me
–Allow space for my emotions
–Allow the people in my life to be where they need to be
–Allow my creativity to express itself without interference from my inner critic
–Allow myself brief sojourns into my past and future, but stay mostly in the present
–Allow myself to trust that everything will work out
Since I made that list several days ago, I’ve thought of more things I need to add. It’s amazing how big that word really is and how many things it can encompass. “Allow” seemed to me a passive verb when it first occurred to me, but now I see it’s a very active verb. In order to allow my intuition to guide me, I need to make time for meditation and actually do it. In order to allow space for my emotions, I need to seek out safe places where I can let those emotions out. In order to allow the people in my life to be where they need to be, I need to instigate conversations free from judgement where I can learn what they need and how best to serve them.
